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From The Chaplain's Desk
From the Chaplain’s Desk: Loving Those You Don't Like
 

By Charles Dimmick, State Chaplain

  JANUARY 1, 2023 --

Therefore as God’s chosen people, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with hearts of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with one another and forgive any complaint you may have against someone else. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Colossians 3:12-13

“But to  you  who  are  listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also.” Luke 6:27

If your enemy falls, do not exult; If he trips, let your heart not rejoice.

Proverb 24:17

If  your  enemy  is  hungry,  give him bread to eat; If he is thirsty, give him water to drink.   Proverb 25:21

Loving  your  enemies,  or  even just loving those you don’t like is one of the most difficult instructions that scripture gives us. First, we need to make sure which definition of “love” we are dealing with.  In a  previous  column  I  pointed  out that there are four words in Greek which we translate as “love”. Each as a different meaning in Greek.  In this case, the passage in Mark in the original Greek uses “agape”, meaning unselfish love, or what the early English versions translated as “charity”. It definitely does not mean romantic love or brotherly love.

With this understanding of “love” our task is no longer impossible, merely very difficult. We are not told that we must “like” everybody, which for some of us is almost impossible  (unless  you  happen to be Will Rogers, who is famous for saying  “I  never  met a man I didn’t like”). Rather we must hold each of our fellow humans in deep enough regard that we treat them with (quoting St. Paul) compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.

Rabbi Hillel, b. 110 B.C., is quoted as saying:  “That  which is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow.  That  is  the  entire  Torah, and the rest  is  its  commentary.” A more positive restatement (also known as “The Golden Rule”) is “Do unto others that which you would wish them to do unto you”. This, at least, is a guideline as to how we should be treating others, setting aside any dislike we may have for them, and giving them as much care, respect, and patience as we would wish for ourselves.

 

 
 
 

 
     
     
       
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